Stop donating to conservatives, or else!

Thanks to the stroke of a legalistic pen, the Chinese have accomplished what all Michael Jackson's surgeries have failed to do: changed conclusively from one color to another.

Toddlers who say "yuck" when given flavorful foreign food may be exhibiting racist behavior, a British government-sponsored organization says.

Remember Mom's advice? "Respect must be earned!"

We've all wished someone dead at one time or another.

No man who is willing to subject himself to additional years of torture out of duty and loyalty to his comrades-in-arms can ever be truly called a scoundrel.

For the stated purpose of reviving our economy, this is nothing more than an exercise in silliness.

Like the Terminator, if there's just one finger still working, she'll drag herself forward by that one finger.

The Transportation Security Administration? Hardly. Thousands Standing Around? Not that either...

Barack seems like a nice guy, and we wish him the very best.